David Rose ponders the complex issue of glitches in the matrix.
When you drop something, which I seem to be doing a lot more of lately, your brain gets a chance to strut its stuff as the supercomputer it was designed to be.
It takes into account the height the object was dropped from, along with its weight, density, and aerodynamic properties. It factors in windage and the surface the object was dropped onto. Was it tile, linoleum, wood floor, or carpet? Did it hit your foot and, if so, what kind of shoes were you wearing at the time are important variables as well.
Calculations are done in a nanosecond and a read-out is sent to your eyes telling them what quadrant to look in and at what radius. The system has been in place since cavemen were dropping Clovis points, but lately, it’s been failing me.
Last week I dropped an olive in the kitchen, and it has never been seen again. And this was a jumbo olive we’re talking about. After that, a watch battery, which was about the size of a dime, and a quarter, which is a good deal bigger than a dime, slipped through my fingers and are still listed as MIA. I went so far as to get down on all fours and use the flashlight feature on my phone to look for the battery.
This is more than a simple glitch in the matrix. I believe we’re all through the looking glass now.
David Malcolm Rose is a product of the 1960s and has never fully managed to leave that fabled decade behind. His books can be found on Amazon and his painting are on display at the Artists’ Workshop Gallery.
