In 2016, 6.5 billion dollars were spent on elections in the USA. That ain’t chicken feed. Unfortunately, Arkansas only benefitted from a small portion of that spending.
The lions share went to Battle Ground States: states where either side can win. A place like Arkansas, which is dead Red, doesn’t get diddly-squat. Let’s face it folks, we’re leaving money on the table here.
We can cash in if we follow a simple two-part program.
1) If you get called by a pollster or receive a questionnaire in the mail, respond to every question with Don’t Know, No Opinion, or None of the Above. By fall Arkansas will be showing a tinge of purple. The Reds will get nervous, the Blues will get hopeful, and money will begin to trickle in.
2) When you go to vote this November, follow this simple rule. Look at your Social Security number. If it’s an even number, vote Republican: if it’s odd, vote Democratic. The final vote will be so close here in the Natural State the recount will go on till Easter.
If we all follow this two step program, political money will flow like manna from heaven in 2020. Not trickle-down money, but cash-up-front money. Money for local TV, radio, magazines and newspapers, Money for home-grown doorknockers, phone callers, spin doctors and mudslingers. Help turn Arkansas Purple and we can turn Arkansas Green in the process.
In a blast from the past, David Rose, author of plenty of satire, and former guest writer to The Springs Magazine, provides a bit of apolitical wisdom for voters this election year.
