Sulcata Tortoise, Percy, feasts on a healthy garden diet. Submitted photo.
By Lana Pierce
(Thank you to Ms. Nancy Hansen, publicist and agent to Percy. Without her people doing lunch with my people, this interview would not have been possible. L.P.)
Q: You left quite the cushy life behind in Palm Springs, CA. People are asking: Why Arkansas? Why Garland County?
Percy: It wasn’t easy, Love. But when family goes, you must leave the comforts behind and follow them. I came with my human, Nancy. At first, I was quite demanding. ‘Bring me bags of ice, Nancy! I need to cool my shell, Nancy!’ But as time went on, I adjusted quite nicely. The southern sun does this rosy complexion wonders.
Q: Your age always causes quite the stir. A life expectancy of 125, yet you appear as youthful as 10. What’s your real age?
Percy: A lady never tells, but those in the know might estimate my age at vivacious, vibrant 15. I credit my California diet. Love, we eat fresh garden greens, cucumbers, zucchini. I eat fruit occasionally—special occasions and the like.
Q: We’ve heard you own quite a home here in Spa City. How does it compare to Cali?
Percy: I’ve made quite the palace here. Dual heating system. I’m comfortable in winter, but I prefer to watch the snowfall from within my domicile. In the summer my Gal Friday Nancy sprays me with cool water. I have no complaints.
Q: Retirees here often keep busy with pickleball and golf. Do you fancy either hobby?
Percy: I’m a leisurely sort, of course. I bask in Nancy’s shadow as she works in the yard. I watch the gate for gentleman callers. I do mind my figure as I’ve seen ladies of my breed reach upwards of 300 pounds! My hobbies are waddling after repairmen and chirping when happy. Call me a tortoise, but I’m a social little bird beneath this shell!
Lana Pierce is a captain with the North Little Rock Fire Department and owner of The RetroFit. Under a pen name, she has been published in over 200 books, journals, and newspapers.